Killing My Self

The concept of “dying to self and living for Christ” is well-known in the church today, but sounds awfully drastic to those who are not schooled in church jargon.  To be clear, the idea is that we have competing desires within each of us, a sinful nature and a soul that craves God and His will.  A gross over-simplification is the old image of the devil and angel sitting on our shoulders.

I fully accept that we are saved by faith in Christ alone.  That said, I also know that having received that gift that I am called to become more like Him through the aid and grace of the Holy Spirit.  The hard part is stamping out that selfish devil.  I know what to be on the lookout for:

When you follow the desires of your sinful nature, the results are very clear: sexual immorality, impurity, lustful pleasures, idolatry, sorcery, hostility, quarreling, jealousy, outbursts of anger, selfish ambition, dissension, division, envy, drunkenness, wild parties, and other sins like these. Let me tell you again, as I have before, that anyone living that sort of life will not inherit the Kingdom of God.

But the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. … Those who belong to Christ Jesus have nailed the passions and desires of their sinful nature to his cross and crucified them there. – Galatians 5:19-24 NLT

We have to actively seek out and destroy that part of our SELF that desires to sin. My biggest struggle continues to be with STUFF.  We struggle month to month with our finances.  Some months are tighter than others.  During the tough months, we stay disciplined by necessity.  When we get a little breathing room, though, we have a bad tendency lose discipline and act as if we “deserve a break” from that discipline.  I know that the only way we’re going to get out of this cycle is to remain vigilant and disciplined.

I’ve also come to realize that I’m part of the problem in what I’m wishing for.  Don’t get me wrong:  we all need hope.  We need something to strive for.  Something that all this discipline is leading to.  The problem I have is that the frivolous stuff creeps its way down the list.  Here’s my new list, with easiest, highest priority on the bottom and most expensive and frivolous up top:

Foreign Vacation

New House

Pool

Season Tickets

Convertible

Bigger TV

Give

Pay off house

Save for College

Retirement Savings

Emergency Savings

Pay off unsecured debt

Get appropriately insured

Emergency Fund

Financial Peace University grads will recognize Dave Ramsey’s baby steps in these priorities.  I will also be the first to admit that there are those who are strong-willed and disciplined enough to keep perspective and can leave those top items up there.  I know myself, though, and I know that even having these items on my list is a temptation.  So they’re off.  For now, at least. Dying to self.